Usually, one assistant comes into the bedroom with a pot of Indonesian coffee (the brew, six hundred dollars a pound and DHL’d from England, where it is rumored to be a favorite of the Royal Family, is sifted from the dung of wild civets) while a second factotum presents me with a freshly bound volume containing selections from every blog and Twitter and Facebook entry that has mentioned my name in the past twenty-four hours—hundreds of pages, with “BRUCE WAGNER” in convenient boldface—but even this lost its allure.

factotum (n) : a servant employed to do a variety of jobs – Best Seats